Sunday, May 28, 2006

The Week After

1 week into my attached life, I found that it wasn't as bad as I feared it would be. Unexpected, but glad certainly. The only change in my life is that now I've got someone to constantly sms and call. Now comes into play my ability to manage time between my gf and frens. The previous few times I had a gf, I practically cut myself off from my frens. It happened with Xiaowei and Huimin on both occassions that we were together. This time round, hopefully it'll be a bit different.

Jess wants her own social life, and I hope to preserve mine as well; sth like a less restrictive relationship. For the 1 week that we were together, she have gone out with her own frens instead of meeting me on 2 occassions. Though I'm fine with it, but the pangs of jealousy will still hit at the beginning. I'll have to soothe my own mind and tell myself that it is for the best of both parties. Of coz I'll still be worried when she's out with other guys; most guys have got their own agenda too. Takes 1 beast to know another eh? Haha

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Attached

The curse has been broken.

After I broke up with Min 6 yrs ago in 2001, this is the first time I'm holding another gal's hand whom I can call my girlfriend. Ok, I'm discounting a lot of things here. Haha. I did hold Min's hand again in 2003, but she is essentially the same person. I held Shannon's hand but I did not regard her as my gf, and I held Princess' hand and both of us did not treat eash other as bf/gf. Well, so that kind of make her the first after 6 years.

But then..... it does feel kinda weird. To be holding a gal's hand again after all these years. To start the "getting to know each other" phase all over again. In some ways, I must say I sort of forgotten how to be a bf. I'm simply too used to the carefree ways, and when with Min, it was different cos I knew her virtually all my life, ntg there for me to get used to. I'm still trying to be myself totally when we are together, trying to establish the flow between us cos I think we're still pretty raw to each other. (What do u expect, when we only known each other for 1 week.)
I felt pretty dumb at times, gotta give way and humour a 20 yr old when I'm at a grand old 26.
Prob that comes with being a bf, regardless of age, but somehow I still feel undermined.

To start things off, it was weird cos it happened by sms. We confirmed our status via sms, and yest was the first time out as a couple. I have qualms abt the serious-ness of this relationship, cos I started it off on the wrong note, by being a big cai-tao. (As usual, what's new?I think I one-up Eugene again... haha) If this relationship is built on the basis of a cai-tao bf, I'm afraid it's not gonna last very long. Well, this is sth which remains to be seen.